“Hey, we have like 20 mutual friends?! Actually, when I look at you long enough, your face does kinda look a bit familiar. I’ll accept your friend request sir, no biggie”. MISTAKE #1: Approving the request of people you straight up don’t know will lead to regret most times. If you have to think about whether or not this looks like the dude that sat across from you in Bio/Calculus/Some random work training seminar in which you really should’ve been paying more attention, then that’s probably not him. Reject the request and keep it moving.
This is the sensible thing to do. Sensible for everyone except me. It’s not like I’m the type of person that cares about the number of friends/followers I have. I just figured that if the whole point of this social networking thing is actually to network, then what’s the harm of interacting with a friend of a friend? In one particular case, however, I will admit that I should have been wary of the stranger with candy and kept to myself.
“Gee I have 17 notifications as soon as I wake up? Today must be a popular day for birthdays. So…. My new ‘friend’ liked every single one of my profile pix in less than five minutes sometime while I slept? That’s totally not creepy. Insomnia and boredom can make trolls out of the best of us”. MISTAKE #2: Don’t give them the benefit of the doubt. Go with your initial instinct and don’t feel like a horrible person for thinking this is weird. ‘It rubs the lotion on its skin or else it gets the hose again’. This is what you’re bound to hear when you’re locked up in a soundproof basement promising to God that you’ll give up all your earthly sins (including Love and Hip Hop).
No, I didn’t delete him afterwards. Not even when he began commenting on everything I posted before/after I added him. Then, the private messages started. ‘Hey how are you?’ Simple messages right? This is obviously just a crush and sooner or later he’ll get the picture. It’s not like I’m going to run into him at Starbucks or anything. I’ll just ignore him and he’ll go away.
Minding my own business at work, some guy approaches me at my desk and tells me he was told to speak to me regarding a service we called his external company to perform at my office. His smile is awfully wide, this company has really pleasant employees! Then he asks, “You’re Cooper right? I think we’re Facebook friends. I like some of your pictures every now and then when I’m bored and scrolling through my newsfeed”. I pause and stare at his face. I then put my brain into overdrive thinking about the profile picture of that extra friendly ‘friend’ I should have never added in the first place. Omg it’s him! What do I say? What do I do? I’ve been silent way too long and he’s probably sensing that I’m nervous. I wonder if he’s like those animals that can sense fear and now knows he has the upper hand. I manager to muster up a “oh hey, I knew you looked familiar”. Good save, I hope he doesn’t try to ask me to lunch. Luckily his work schedule seems full so there leaves very little time for small talk as he has to rush off to another client. Of course he’s been thinking of our encounter all day as I see his message sitting in my inbox as soon as I check my notifications when I get home. Sigh…. Now he knows where I work AND we’re probably going to need services from his company again in the near future. I can’t just delete him knowing for certain I will see him again whether or not I like it.
Don’t be like me. Nip it in the bud and go with your instinct if you feel something is off about a potential ‘friend’. Now I’m stuck being cordial with someone who totally creeps me out but it’s my own fault for letting him into my life in the first place. Some people see a few posts of you online then the next thing you know, they think they really know you. If you guys don’t hear from me in the next few weeks, there’s a possibility he followed me home from work and has forced me to become his gf. There’s a chance I will be required to post it on my social media in order to prove that our romance is real (relationship standards in 2015). I will use this opportunity to send an encrypted message for help. Worst case scenario, I leave all my makeup to my co-worker Nicole and my cat can keep everything else.
Lately I’ve been blanking out a lot. It’s like my body would be there but my mind would not be present. Ever find yourself sitting at your desk at work or in class and the next thing you know 20 minutes had passed by and you hadn’t made any progress on what you were supposed to be working on. It’s not that you were daydreaming about an oiled up Channing Tatum (a la Magic Mike 😍) or thinking about how awesome that Spiced Pumpkin Latte will be when you can finally grab a cup on your break. So what could’ve kept your mind so preoccupied that you didn’t even remember to peek at your phone for your hourly notification check-up? You probably have 17 messages from that annoying Whatsapp group you’re too scared to exit (no need to seem antisocial, just mute it and try to go on with your life) plus only God knows what’s happening on IG after so much time has passed! For all you know, Beyoncé could have posted one of those cute family shots online and you would’ve missed it. Good luck participating in any upcoming conversations with your peers 😢. You were busy all morning and this was your first opportunity for a mental break and you wasted it staring into space.
You finally snap out of it and the first question you ask yourself is “What the hell am I doing”? No, not in that very moment while you’re reassessing what’s left on your to-do list that day. In the grand scheme of things……what are you doing? Every day you wake up, drive to that job that gives you absolutely no fulfilment and after eight hours, you drive back home and repeat the cycle four more times that week. Luckily you get two days off where you can go grocery shopping, do laundry and sneak in a few much needed cocktails….. happy happy, joy joy. Everything has become so repetitive and mundane, for the most part, you don’t even bother to pay attention to the details anymore. An activity such as driving is simply a necessary part of the routine which enables you to get where you need, when you need. All you know is that you have to sit at no less than four stoplights to make it to your destination. Stoplight #1 provides access for a quick turn for green smoothies and stoplight #4 has the local ice-cream parlour. You leave home and 30 minutes later you’re parking your car and there’s a medium caramel milkshake sitting in your cup-holder. You’re left feeling both confused and guilty as its only at that point, you vaguely remember gathering some change from your coin purse for the impulse purchase. The guilt comes when you think about the calorie intake but who cares about the calories at that point. You’ve already made the purchase and that milkshake is freaking awesome 😋.
These are the small treats you currently live for; high calorie snacks and sales at Forever 21. You’re not living, just drifting on day by day. Find yourself! Do you even know who you are outside of your circle of friends or your significant other? You compromise with social activities and go along with other people’s suggestions as it regards what you should do in your free time. However, what would you choose to do if you had a list of infinite choices and the only opinion that mattered was yours? Where would you go? Let’s take it one step further and ask where would you work, hell, where would you even live? There’s a whole world out there. One of the best parts of being a millennial is that you can choose your own path, live and learn and you’re still young enough to start over and fix past mistakes if needed. That sounds horribly irresponsible when you say it like that but for the most part it’s true. I personally am more than aware of all of this, however, why am I still allowing myself to drift on in this sea of discontent simply because it’s safe? Better safe than sorry, right? Sigh…. Young people problems.
As you may or may not be able to tell at this point, I have a pretty eclectic ear when it comes to what I groove to. Although I love to jam my old school music, I have different tunes for different moods. For instance, my 80s music keeps me in a feel good mood while at work. The more soulful songs from the 60s and 70s keep a pep in my step while I’m on my feet cooking and cleaning on Sundays. 90s RnB makes me reminisce of the days when I had my first puppy love and still believed I would marry Nick Carter 😍😍😍.
NB: I would hope that everyone reading this post knows who that is 😔. If not, I will excuse you for a moment while you search Google Images and get your life together 😐……… Are we all on the same page now? Good, let’s move forward 😉.
However, many are surprised when they discover my love of rap music. No, I’m not talking Mackelmore/Vanilla Ice rap. I’m talking Eminem, Kanye and Meek Mill (before his tragic death – RIP to the Dream Chaser 😢). For me, rap is like that bae that isn’t always the most positive influence in your life but you still can’t seem to leave it alone. Though the same was once said about rock n roll, simply put in the words of Yeezy, rap is pretty much like Crack Music. And just like a recreational drug user, people may think that I only dabble with it here and there but my habit is bigger than many will assume. Granted, I’m not pawning my Mom’s jewellery to go see Jay-Z in Madison Square Garden but….. I may sacrifice some happy hour sessions at the local pubs to go see Nicki in Miami. It’s only a 45-minute flight and one night at the Holiday Inn. I should be ok next payday 😉.
I gather that my soft spoken demeanour is the reason that people assume this type of music is too harsh for me. However, just like my other music, rap serves its purpose. It keeps me focused when I’m trying to push myself during a workout. I know if I can get through at least two Young Money songs, I would’ve put in a good 10 minutes on the stair climber 😁. Everything after that point is just icing on the cake. Rap keeps me focused while driving and brings out my inner road demon. It helps clear my mind when I’m doing 100 on the highway. So if you do the speed limit get the f**k out of my way (in my Ludacris voice 😁) lol. I really barely do 60 on the highway but you get what I’m saying.
Ultimately, rap has been associated with negative connotations for many years now but just like other genres, it still has aspects that can move people in a more positive way. Not everyone is going out to buy a glock or spend their entire pay check on big booty girls after hearing a song. However, regardless of your personal music preferences for various situations, it’s important to sit back and enjoy it to the fullest. Whether it be for fun or more cathartic reasons, take it all in. Not just the melody but the lyrics as well. If you enjoy music as much as I do, you’ll feel much better afterwards.
Are there any other rap lovers out there? Let me know in the comments and stay tuned for my next post.
Well as I mentioned on my ‘About Me’ page, I am a twenty something year old college grad living on an island in the Bahamas. I’ve never had a blog before so this is my first go-around. I was in love with writing all my life but have not done so in years. Not due to lack of passion but I had some crummy English professors in college who completely killed my spirit. As I’ve recently reignited my love for the arts I said: “WTH, why not put myself out there? What’s the worst that can happen?”
I decided to call my blog ‘myeighty9’ as it signifies the year I was born as well as the decade of which I am the most in love. I also feel very passionate about the 90s and the 70s were alright too but when it comes to music, the 80s are my life. Once I get in my Hall and Oats, Billy Idol, The Police/Sting kind of mood nothing can bring me down. Sigh…if only my parents had me 15 years earlier. I would have been old enough to appreciate the awesomeness of George Michaels while still being a teenager and he was still publicly being a heterosexual. However, then I would have missed out on the gems of my generation such as Miley Cyrus and trap music 😒. Consequently I’m stuck living my life between the classics of TvLand and Turner Classic Movies and the ratchetness of VH1 and Bravo. I think I have a pretty good balance as a young person with an old soul.
Additionally, I’ve been looking at some other blogs on WordPress and I am sad to announce that my blog will not be about saving the plant, philanthropy, or any other causes most likely to be displayed in an early morning infomercial. Not saying that I don’t respect those who choose to dedicate his/her blog to a good cause or that I don’t have personal situations which I can share in that regard. I’m simply choosing not to do so. I want to use this blog as my artistic outlet while I smother you with more light and fluffy stuff 😜.
Please bare with me in the upcoming weeks as I try to get myself organized. I don’t have any ankle bitters , mini nuisances, little angels 😇 in my life so I have lots of time to get it together sooner rather than later. Thanks to anyone that’s reading this. I love you like XO 😘.